I always assumed it was my husband and/or brother in law maybe even my dad that was the rock. I am coming to a different conclusion now...maybe it is supposed to me...the wife. You know the saying "behind every good man is an even better woman" what if it is more fact than fiction. I've heard countless times from the pulpit that women are the ones that helped hold the church together. Maybe it's true. Maybe women are the glue - no, let's say beautiful stitching - in the tapestry called marriage and family. After all aren't we generally the ones that are on our knees most of the time...praying for our children...praying for our husband.
So what does this mean to me...It means I should be constant. I should do my best to control my mood and emotions. Does this mean I can't get be upset or angry? No it means I can have these emotions but keep them under control. I don't let them get the best of me. Two very wise women once told me that while I am the one lifting my husbands hands they are behind me lifting mine. So I think that a good Godly girlfriend or two is a good idea. Not five or six but one or two...maybe even a VERY small accountability group. Women whom you will NOT gossip with but women who you can go to...who will come to you and you can be the one's praying for each other. Women whom you are HONEST with. There can be no personality change to every thing's perfect when you're together, these are the women with whom you share your problems, they are the lifter of your hands when you are holding your husbands.
When my husband is weakened I need to come to the conclusion that it isn't my time to crumble it is my time to stand strong. Even when it hurts. There comes a moment when it is my turn to fight. So with the Lord on MY side I will do just that...go boldly into battle because I have already won the war.
Psalm 40:2 NIV
"He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand"
Lord help me to be a rock to all those around me. My family, children, and my husband. Fill me with your strength so that I am the constant in a time of turmoil. Give my YOUR wisdom to help guide those around me. Thank Lord for being my rock and constant. In Jesus name, Amen
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
If it's not one thing...
It seems if it's not one thing it's another.
I came to the conclusion last week that I needed to pray a different way. I had been praying for the Lord to help me find a job. When I prayed this way my intent was Lord put me in a full time, 40 hours a week, good pay with benefits position; well it was time to change that prayer. My new prayer became Lord help me adjust and thrive in the role you want me in, if you want me at home help me be productive and successful, if you want me to substitute teach only help me be successful and give me favor. It was Wednesday night that I prayed this prayer. Not an hour after I prayed this prayer I was on a new path. By the next morning I was a co-teacher of a 4 year old pre-school class at a reputable local church. In this position I will be doing regular teaching duties such as lesson plans and following curriculum. How excited I am! I get to have lots of practice for a regular teaching position but make my mistakes with precious 4 year olds where they will love me anyway instead of with 7th and 8th graders will will notice. I also am working 2 days a week about 100 yards from where my daughter goes to school. I still get to volunteer at her school and continue with my PTO work. God is good. I do have to remember to continue to lean on the Lord and let him provide for us. It would be so easy to say "Ok God I'll take it from here" but I don't want to do that because look how far he has brought me!
Ok so light at the end of this tunnel proved not to be a train. Well the light at the end of the personal life tunnel seems to have disappeared. I don't fell like I am on the same page as anyone; my husband nor my support system. At this point I just feel the need to deal with my personal stuff by myself. I guess all I can really do right now is pray, when all I really want to do right now is jump in the car and take off. Leave it all behind me and head to the beach. It's easy to find God in the ocean, I guess I need to find him in this personal situation. Maybe I was so job focused that the other stuff fell out of focus.
Lord help me to be a peace maker and not a drama maker!
I came to the conclusion last week that I needed to pray a different way. I had been praying for the Lord to help me find a job. When I prayed this way my intent was Lord put me in a full time, 40 hours a week, good pay with benefits position; well it was time to change that prayer. My new prayer became Lord help me adjust and thrive in the role you want me in, if you want me at home help me be productive and successful, if you want me to substitute teach only help me be successful and give me favor. It was Wednesday night that I prayed this prayer. Not an hour after I prayed this prayer I was on a new path. By the next morning I was a co-teacher of a 4 year old pre-school class at a reputable local church. In this position I will be doing regular teaching duties such as lesson plans and following curriculum. How excited I am! I get to have lots of practice for a regular teaching position but make my mistakes with precious 4 year olds where they will love me anyway instead of with 7th and 8th graders will will notice. I also am working 2 days a week about 100 yards from where my daughter goes to school. I still get to volunteer at her school and continue with my PTO work. God is good. I do have to remember to continue to lean on the Lord and let him provide for us. It would be so easy to say "Ok God I'll take it from here" but I don't want to do that because look how far he has brought me!
Ok so light at the end of this tunnel proved not to be a train. Well the light at the end of the personal life tunnel seems to have disappeared. I don't fell like I am on the same page as anyone; my husband nor my support system. At this point I just feel the need to deal with my personal stuff by myself. I guess all I can really do right now is pray, when all I really want to do right now is jump in the car and take off. Leave it all behind me and head to the beach. It's easy to find God in the ocean, I guess I need to find him in this personal situation. Maybe I was so job focused that the other stuff fell out of focus.
Lord help me to be a peace maker and not a drama maker!
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